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Hopkirk

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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My uncle has been taken into hospital with abdominal pain. When they x-rayed him they could see six toy horses in his stomach. The doctors describe his condition as stable....
06:40 Sun 17th Jul 20227 answers, last by maggiebee 10:43 Sun 17th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

A shop assistant fought off a robber with a labelling gun. Police are looking for a man with a price on his head....
07:02 Sat 16th Jul 20229 answers, last by 10ClarionSt 08:11 Sat 16th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My dog is called Shark. I'm not sure it was such a good idea to take him to the beach yesterday....
07:13 Fri 15th Jul 202210 answers, last by Chipchopper 11:18 Fri 15th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I went into a shop and asked "can I have a bottle of shampoo please" The assistant said "extra volume? "CAN I HAVE A BOTTLE OF SHAMPOO PLEASE!"...
06:35 Thu 14th Jul 202214 answers, last by Chipchopper 09:13 Thu 14th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I've left my job in a shoe recycling factory. It was sole destroying....
07:18 Wed 13th Jul 202218 answers, last by Arksided 16:16 Wed 13th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

The man who invented wordsearch has died. His funeral will be held next TTISVPGKMP HJGUONQUXJ NMONDAYWZ BATKTENOPG HCVNKOTDIM...
08:06 Tue 12th Jul 20228 answers, last by Ken4155 10:18 Tue 12th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I didn't understand when my wife said I was holding the bag of pasta upside down. Then the penne dropped....
06:52 Mon 11th Jul 202216 answers, last by mallyh 13:50 Mon 11th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The

My wife and I are tightrope walkers. We met online....
07:59 Sun 10th Jul 202215 answers, last by Hopkirk 23:12 Sun 10th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

Have you noticed that several formula one drivers have names of Scottish towns? Stirling Moss Eddie Irvine Lewis Hamilton Ayr Town Centre...
07:59 Sat 09th Jul 202211 answers, last by Hopkirk 21:30 Sat 09th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I just rang the council to ask permission to have a skip outside my house. "Go for it fatty" she said "you could use the exercise"....
06:56 Fri 08th Jul 202217 answers, last by 1ozzy 08:37 Fri 08th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

The difference between men and women is that if a woman asks you to smell something, it is usually nice.
06:46 Thu 07th Jul 202210 answers, last by Arksided 11:01 Thu 07th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

Apparently tequila probably won't save your life, but it's worth a shot.
06:50 Wed 06th Jul 20225 answers, last by Patsy33 10:06 Wed 06th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My wife asked if I knew any tennis puns. I replied "They're really not my forte, love."...
07:22 Tue 05th Jul 202214 answers, last by Bazile 12:19 Tue 05th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Language Difficulties

Have you had difficulty communicating while overseas? I struggled at a McDonald's in the US After placing my order the staff member rapidly said what sounded like "izitagaw". I said pardon a couple of...
14:47 Mon 04th Jul 202236 answers, last by DTCwordfan 07:57 Tue 05th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My inflatable house got a puncture last night. Now I'm living in a flat....
07:14 Mon 04th Jul 202217 answers, last by Arksided 17:16 Mon 04th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I said to my wife "Would you like a KitKat Chunky" Five hours in A&E....
08:23 Sun 03rd Jul 20223 answers, last by Arksided 10:46 Sun 03rd Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I keep saying "Welsh rabbit" instead of "Welsh rarebit". I think I'm suffering from mixing my toasties....
07:46 Sat 02nd Jul 20228 answers, last by zebo 21:54 Sat 02nd Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I'm dating an anaesthetist. She's a local girl....
07:09 Fri 01st Jul 202213 answers, last by Patsy33 07:43 Fri 01st Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I just met a girl who runs a battery kiosk in our local park. She sells C cells by the seesaw....
07:35 Thu 30th Jun 202211 answers, last by 1ozzy 06:33 Fri 01st Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I went into a pet shop and asked for twelve bees. The owner counted out thirteen and handed them over. I said "You've given me one too many" He replied "That one is a freebie"...
06:47 Wed 29th Jun 20229 answers, last by Chipchopper 14:54 Wed 29th Jun 2022

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