Donate SIGN UP

marval

3201 to 3220 of 3998

First Previous 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 Next Last

Avatar Image
marval

Works

A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat. Says He: "I'm sorry honey but I'm up to my neck in work today" Says She: "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you...
17:24 Sun 09th Oct 20112 answers, last by wildwood 05:42 Mon 10th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Groan

A jelly baby walks in to a bar and starts talking to a smartie. After a few beers the smartie says: 'A bunch of us are heading to that new club. Fancy tagging along?' 'No thanks, 'the jelly baby...
13:18 Sat 08th Oct 20115 answers, last by Starbuckone 23:59 Sat 08th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Sweet

On the first day of their Honeymoon, the very naive virgin bride slipped into a sexy but sweet nightie and, with great anticipation, crawled into bed. She found that her new Christian husband had...
21:15 Fri 07th Oct 20118 answers, last by crisgal 20:45 Sat 08th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Finished

A guy was on a business trip and he's staying in this fancy hotel. When he goes up to his room there's a sign near the bed that says "Try our Oriental Massage". So he rings down to the...
11:40 Fri 07th Oct 20115 answers, last by didoatwork 20:53 Fri 07th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Wish

When the man and wife got into bed for some lovemaking one night, instead of responding she was complaining about economic conditions of the world. "Everything is going up," she whined....
16:25 Thu 06th Oct 20112 answers, last by Starbuckone 23:17 Thu 06th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Gym

I have just been to the gym. They've got a new machine in. Could only use it for half an hour, as I started to feel sick. It's great though. It provides me with everything I need KitKats, Mars Bars,...
14:37 Wed 05th Oct 20117 answers, last by weecalf 12:33 Thu 06th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Oops

Wife to Husband: "I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear." Husband to Wife: "Kitchen, bathroom, living room." The funeral was last Tuesday....
18:50 Tue 04th Oct 20112 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 20:15 Tue 04th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

First Date

A guy walks into a bookstore. Not looking for anything in particular. On his way to the back of the store, he spots something of interest. A book with a very interesting title, "Dating for the...
22:38 Mon 03rd Oct 20111 answer, last by Starbuckone 09:00 Tue 04th Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

E-mail

One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the misbehaving that was going on. So he called one of His angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time.. When the angel returned, he told God,...
14:37 Sun 02nd Oct 20112 answers, last by old-wos-is-name 20:11 Sun 02nd Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Drive

A Man in went into a bar and asked for 30 martinis in a bucket. "What?" questioned the bartender, "Why would you want so many martinis?” "My horse likes them," replied...
15:04 Fri 30th Sep 20112 answers, last by wildwood 07:23 Mon 03rd Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Please

A homeless guy is travelling down a country lane, tired and hungry he comes across a Pub called the "George and the Dragon." Although it's late and the Pub is closed he knocks on the door....
16:47 Thu 29th Sep 20113 answers, last by carlton23 15:26 Sat 01st Oct 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Tongs

Mrs Hamilton-smythe was giving an upper-crust party and had hired Mary, a girl recently come as a maid. As Mary was setting up the tea service, Mrs Hamilton-smythe told her to be certain that there...
16:38 Tue 27th Sep 20113 answers, last by marval 22:48 Tue 27th Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Cake

A woman in a diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight. She'd made her family's favourite cake over the weekend, she reported, and they'd eaten half of it at dinner. The next day, she said,...
14:49 Mon 26th Sep 20117 answers, last by marval 16:22 Tue 27th Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Expensive

A young woman wasn't feeling well, and asked one of her co-workers to recommend a physician. "I know a great one in the city, but he is very expensive. Five hundred pounds for the first visit,...
16:17 Sat 24th Sep 20114 answers, last by marval 12:12 Mon 26th Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Great job

The homeowner was delighted with the way Charlie had done all the paintwork on his house. "You did a great job," he said as he handed Charlie his money. "Also, in order to thank-you,...
12:38 Sat 24th Sep 20111 answer, last by RATTER15 12:43 Sat 24th Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

It's me

The little girl was so proud of her birthday presents, her first watch and her first perfume. She really made a pest of herself throughout the morning, going up to all the relatives and sticking that...
19:30 Fri 23rd Sep 20113 answers, last by wildwood 22:42 Sun 25th Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Never need

A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counselling came up. "Oh, we’ll never need that. My wife and I have a great relationship,"...
17:44 Thu 22nd Sep 20112 answers, last by China Doll 10:46 Fri 23rd Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Nugget

A Husband and Wife, Both were very happy over the twelve pound baby boy that was born to them. Mr. Brown who could not conceal his delight, called up the editor of a famous newspaper and reported that...
22:16 Wed 21st Sep 20111 answer, last by Starbuckone 16:45 Thu 22nd Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Dad

A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later..."Da-ad..." "What?" "I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?" "No. You had your chance. Lights...
21:51 Tue 20th Sep 20115 answers, last by didoatwork 16:48 Wed 21st Sep 2011
Avatar Image
marval

Oh dear

A rather handsome mature gentleman was chatting up a young lady at a party. He suggested they retire to his place of residence where he would have mad sex with her in the kitchen, the dining room, the...
22:43 Mon 19th Sep 20112 answers, last by bluebirdino 19:04 Tue 20th Sep 2011

3201 to 3220 of 3998

First Previous 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 Next Last