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Patsy33

381 to 400 of 1937

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Patsy33

My Friend

My friend lost his job at the pet shop... He got caught with his hand in the trill....
16:36 Sun 09th Feb 20201 answer, last by Togo 21:26 Sun 09th Feb 2020
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Patsy33

Stole

Someone stole £5000 worth of Red Bull from a local delivery truck. How do these people sleep at night?...
22:31 Thu 06th Feb 20201 answer, last by Chipchopper 10:33 Fri 07th Feb 2020
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Patsy33

Aging Rock Bands

I’ve opened up a gym helping ageing rock bands get back into shape. It’s going okay so far... Just working out the Kinks....
19:32 Mon 03rd Feb 202026 answers, last by Mexican18 13:05 Thu 06th Feb 2020
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Patsy33

Inside No. 9

If you're a fan of this series, the 5th Series is starting Monday, 3rd Feb at 10 pm BBC2. Can't wait!
15:30 Sat 01st Feb 20205 answers, last by Rosie29 22:00 Sat 01st Feb 2020
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Patsy33

Out Of Date Icing Sugar

I was just getting ingredients out to make a chocolate victiria sponge, when I noticed the date on icing sugar is 11/11/17! Do you think it will be ok to use it or buy another one. Shop is 2 minutes...
15:39 Fri 31st Jan 20206 answers, last by Patsy33 15:46 Fri 31st Jan 2020
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Patsy33

A Shifty Looking Guy..

A shifty looking guy in a kilt walks into a London pub He orders a pint and very very carefully puts down the plastic bag he is carrying. The bartender asks "What's that?" The guy answers "6 pounds of...
13:30 Fri 31st Jan 20206 answers, last by bookbinder 19:06 Fri 31st Jan 2020
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Patsy33

How We Sleep

It's funny how we all sleep differently. I sleep on my side, my brother sleeps on his back, my husband sleeps with everybody. That sort of thing.....
12:16 Thu 30th Jan 20208 answers, last by Theland 18:57 Fri 31st Jan 2020
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Patsy33

A Horse

The psychiatrist asks his patient: "Do you really think that you are a horse?" The patient: "Yes." The Doctor: "Ok, it will be a long and expensive therapy." The patient: "It's ok, I have enough...
12:22 Wed 29th Jan 202015 answers, last by Patsy33 18:02 Wed 29th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

I Named..

I named my two children Lager and Guinness. My wife is Bitter....
20:21 Mon 27th Jan 202014 answers, last by Chipchopper 19:28 Tue 28th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

My Mother

My Mother used to wash my hair in Lager. It wasn't until years later that I discovered I'd been Fostered......
19:53 Mon 27th Jan 20207 answers, last by Theland 10:04 Tue 28th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Into Work..

I took my 8-year-old to the office on Take Your Kid to Work Day. As we were walking around, she starting crying and getting very cranky, so I asked her what was wrong. As my coworkers gathered round,...
13:33 Mon 27th Jan 20203 answers, last by Patsy33 15:19 Mon 27th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

I Have

I have lots of bum jokes if you like them. I have piles..
21:56 Sun 26th Jan 20206 answers, last by Hopkirk 10:09 Mon 27th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Online Dating

I wanted to try online dating, so I clicked around until I saw someone I found attractive. We started chatting, and everything was going great, until she told me her career is "professional blood...
13:18 Sat 25th Jan 202011 answers, last by EmmaWhite 15:58 Thu 25th Feb 2021
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Patsy33

Unhealthy Obsession

My friend has an unhealthy obsession with ocean life. I told her to sea kelp...
17:27 Fri 24th Jan 20206 answers, last by retrocop 15:16 Sat 25th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Vegan Rap...

What the hell?.... https://youtu.be/qACxfKB3iP4...
11:05 Thu 23rd Jan 20206 answers, last by Patsy33 15:35 Thu 23rd Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Play On Words

eg.. Gelatine: Device for cutting the heads off jelly babies Push: Sean Connery's cat. Your turn.....
21:11 Wed 22nd Jan 20207 answers, last by Patsy33 21:28 Sat 25th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Detained

As an aspiring actor, I was somewhat surprised when I got detained by airport security today... All I said was that I was in town to shoot a pilot......
22:22 Tue 21st Jan 20209 answers, last by Patsy33 17:24 Wed 22nd Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Trial

A perpetual criminal offender is brought to the court house for trial. However the judge is a duck wearing robes and a powdered wig . The criminal is incensed, he shouts out "I will not be judged by a...
23:52 Sun 19th Jan 202023 answers, last by Chipchopper 22:18 Mon 20th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

T Shirt..

I found a nice boy's Ralph Lauren t shirt, while looking in a charity shop last week. It was age 11-12, £1.99, and in excellent condition. Seen my daughter in law just now and asked if it fit my...
20:00 Sat 18th Jan 20205 answers, last by Patsy33 20:18 Sat 18th Jan 2020
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Patsy33

Gin

My partner reckons I drink too much Gin. This came as a bit of a shock. I didn’t even realise I had a partner....
22:30 Thu 16th Jan 202012 answers, last by Patsy33 00:52 Fri 17th Jan 2020

381 to 400 of 1937

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