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Seafarer1966

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Bobbisox

the oldies are the best ones..lol

I get on extremely well with the lesbians next door. They asked me what I would like for my birthday. I was stunned when they gave me a Rolex. It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood...
19:02 Sun 31st Jan 201013 answers, last by Seafarer1966 14:38 Mon 01st Feb 2010
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McMouse

Monday morning

A bloke from Doncaster wakes up with a sore rectum. He goes to the shop and say's to the shopkeeper 'Nah then,does tha' sell A*se cream? The shopkeeper replies, Aye,lad,we do. Does tha' want a magnum...
11:53 Mon 01st Feb 20102 answers, last by marval 14:46 Mon 01st Feb 2010
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Seafarer1966

Elton John

Elton John goes to a tattooist to get a picture of a Rolls-Royce tattooed on his appendage. The tattooist tries to convince him to get a picture of a Land Rover on it instead. Elton enquires why. The...
15:35 Thu 28th Jan 201020 answers, last by Seafarer1966 14:36 Mon 01st Feb 2010
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McMouse

Q. What's the difference between sliced bread and Italians?

A. You can make soldiers out of the bread.
11:11 Fri 29th Jan 20101 answer, last by Seafarer1966 14:29 Mon 01st Feb 2010
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squarebear

Manchester City

What do Manchester City and Paul McCartney have in common? . . . . They both get excited over one leg!...
10:57 Fri 29th Jan 201013 answers, last by Seafarer1966 16:45 Fri 29th Jan 2010
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tali1

London -nation/community areas?

Jews in Golders Green , Bengalis in Tower Hamlets,Sikhs in Southall ,West Indians were Notting Hill What are the other London areas/postcodes particular to a nation/community?...
18:29 Wed 27th Jan 20108 answers, last by Justincider 18:56 Sat 20th Feb 2010
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swansgal

Man having operation

A surgeon was operating on a man when he slips and accidentally cuts off the mans b@lls. He quickly inserts two onions and sews his scrotum back up. One month later the man goes back for a check up....
00:08 Thu 28th Jan 20102 answers, last by Seafarer1966 15:31 Thu 28th Jan 2010
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ahmskunnirt

No Police On The Streets? No Wonder!

Justice Secretary Jack Straw simply has no idea of the crippling amount of paperwork which Police Officers are burdened with, even when dealing with the most minor misdemeanour. So, what is the more...
13:11 Thu 07th Jan 201030 answers, last by ahmskunnirt 13:08 Fri 08th Jan 2010
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Seafarer1966

Driving Licence Due to Expire

My photocard driving licence expires in March this year. What's the procedure for renewing it and how much will the DVLA charge? (Please TWR don't post an answer).
15:43 Thu 07th Jan 201010 answers, last by sarah_louise 12:50 Mon 11th Jan 2010
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imhotep

Flat battery!! :(

Hi! I was hoping if anyone has any advice on how to get my car going again. It was okay the other day,and was running fine. Today I decided to stock up with a bit of shopping,but when I turned the...
14:35 Thu 07th Jan 201029 answers, last by imhotep 23:01 Thu 07th Jan 2010
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jack daniels

Rib of beef

I'm not keen on beef but Mr jd fancied some roast beef for xmas dinner. I seared it in a frying pan, then put it in the oven on full heat for 20 mins covered with foil & then put it on gas mark 5...
15:56 Thu 31st Dec 200912 answers, last by EDDIE51 16:41 Fri 01st Jan 2010
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marval

VIrgin

A young man was planning to get married, and asked his doctor how he could tell if his bride is a virgin. The doctor says, "Well you need three things. A can of red paint, a can of blue paint and...
00:16 Tue 29th Dec 20097 answers, last by Seafarer1966 16:30 Thu 31st Dec 2009
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trt

Earlier post showing girls parachuting from a plane.

Can anybody tell me which topic it was on?
21:29 Wed 30th Dec 20096 answers, last by Seafarer1966 11:43 Thu 31st Dec 2009
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Caldera

Telescopic sights

Two hunters walking back home. One of them looks through his sights and says to the other, "i can see your house from here and i can see your wife cheating on you!" Angrily his friend tells...
09:45 Thu 31st Dec 20091 answer, last by Seafarer1966 11:33 Thu 31st Dec 2009
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Seafarer1966

Policewoman

A young policewoman was out in the cold weather gathering evidence and she wished she'd put her thermal underwear on. Her colleague advised her to let the police alsatian sniff her lady bits, and the...
18:05 Wed 30th Dec 20094 answers, last by Seafarer1966 18:26 Wed 30th Dec 2009
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gravytrainer

CRY BABY? PLEASE COME BACK.....

Cry Babynok Bunting Daddy's gone a-hunting Gone to fetch a rabbit skin To wrap the Babynok's Bunting in...boo hoo, blub, cry, scream, choke, sniffle, wah wah wah.... Im off now and will catch all my...
16:00 Wed 30th Dec 20094 answers, last by gravytrainer 18:12 Wed 30th Dec 2009
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Barmaid

Coollant warning like on Mercedes SLK

Last night, my coollant warning light came on. Checked all the levels - all OK. Belt looks OK. But fan does appear to be making a funny noise. However there is another thing which is completely empty...
14:02 Wed 16th Dec 200918 answers, last by Seafarer1966 16:13 Wed 30th Dec 2009
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softtail

underground staions

all the answers are underground stations the numbers of letters in each answer is in brackets. 1. Has he now gone onto marmite (10) 2. this would lead to cornwall (5,4) 3. Fat pig joint (6) 4. would...
15:40 Wed 30th Dec 20099 answers, last by Wally1 16:50 Wed 30th Dec 2009
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__NOK__

I had to go to dfs today.

My wife asked me to get her something figure hugging in black leather for her birthday I had to go to dfs.
01:20 Wed 30th Dec 20094 answers, last by Seafarer1966 10:38 Wed 30th Dec 2009
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DC_FC

Anti freeze

I accidently poured some anti freeze into the bit for the windscreen wash, would teh anti freeze affect the paint or anything, how can i get rid of the anti freeze in the windscreen wash bottle
18:25 Sat 12th Dec 20095 answers, last by Seafarer1966 10:32 Wed 30th Dec 2009

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