Shaglene Member Profile in The AnswerBank

Alzheimers Society!

This years Alzheimer"s Society annual fair will be a day to remember...

Two Eggs!

Two eggs boiling in a pan. One says, "I've got a huge crack." The other replies, "Stop teasing me, I'm not *** hard yet."...

Voltage

A big city doctor visits an Indian tribe full of men, he asks "How do you guys relieve your sexual tension?" "Simple, just come down to the river tomorrow and we'll show you." The next day the doctor...

Voltage

Mad Mary!

Mad Mary was whizzing around the mental hospital in her wheelchair when she was stopped by Crazy Carl. “Licence please,” he said, Mary sped off round the corner and bumped into Looney Leon....

Baldric

999

Boy: *calls 999* Hello? I need your help! 999: Alright, What is it? Boy: Two girls are fighting over me! 999: So what's your emergency? Boy: The ugly one is winning....

Baldric

Who Did It?

A blonde goes to the doctor's and finds out she is pregnant with twins. She starts crying and the doctor asks her what's wrong. She replies, "I know who the dad is for one of them but I don't know who...

Baldric

Doh!

Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown. She then goes for a drive in the country and sees a shepherd herding his sheep across the road. "Hey, shepherd, if I guess how many sheep...

Voltage

An Englishman, An Irishman And A Scotsman

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar, drinking and discussing how stupid their wives were. The Englishman says, “I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to...

Patsy33

Do You Ever

Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you, and be glad that you are alive? I did and apparently won’t be allowed on this airline again …...

marval

My Friend

My friend has challenged me to see who can produce the most saliva. It is a mouth watering contest....

Voltage

Halloween!

I bought my wife some crotchless knickers for Halloween, nothing sexual, just to give her a better grip on her broomstick.

Voltage

A Skunk!

A couple driving home hit and wounded a skunk on the road. The wife gets out and brings it back to the car. "We need to take it to a vet. Its shivering, it must be cold, what should I do?" she asks....

Voltage

On Safari!

I was recently on safari in the Serengeti and witnessed two male lions having sex . I thought blimey, have they got no pride?...

Voltage

New Sat Nav

I’ve bought a new sat nav, it’s really a good one . Yesterday I drove past a Zoo and it said bear left....

Patsy33

I've Fallen..

I've fallen in love with a another ventriloquists doll, but she's already spoken for....

Voltage

I Was In London

As i was in London i thought i'd visit soho i went into a sex shop . I was really shocked to find out how much all my wife's vibrators cost! She's been sitting on a small fortune!...

Voltage

2 Seats At The Theatre

As I'm big and tall I treated myself to two seats at the theatre to have more room! When i got there i handed the usher two tickets. The usher asked, "Where's the other party?" I said "Well, you see...