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excelsior-1

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Psybbo

Tilly

How did your first day go?
19:13 Wed 23rd Oct 201311 answers, last by Tilly2 19:42 Wed 23rd Oct 2013
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maggiebee

Job Description:

Someone asked me, Now that your retired, "Do you still have a Job?" I replied, "Yes, I'm my wife's sexual adviser." Somewhat shocked, they said "I beg your pardon, but what do you mean by that?" . . ....
09:44 Wed 23rd Oct 201311 answers, last by Fanriffic 22:14 Wed 23rd Oct 2013
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marval

Exorcist

Once Mrs. Smith and Mrs. Green met during a New Year's party. After an hour talking and drinking Mrs. Smith told her friend, "They call my husband 'The Exorcist.'" With a great surprise Mrs. Green...
21:43 Tue 22nd Oct 20133 answers, last by frugalfred 22:39 Tue 22nd Oct 2013
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wendilla

Spacestation Sighting Over The Uk This Evening

1st sighting 7 23pm for 3 mins WSW departing SE 2ND SIGHTING 8 58 PM for 1 min W departing WSW For anyone lucky enough to have a clear sky the unmanned Cygnus Spacecraft is approaching the ISS with...
17:55 Tue 22nd Oct 20134 answers, last by excelsior-1 18:09 Tue 22nd Oct 2013
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anneasquith

Fao.meglet

I see you online, hope you and new baby are well.
13:23 Tue 22nd Oct 201317 answers, last by meglet 17:41 Tue 22nd Oct 2013
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Butterbun

The Clock.

Bert and Max are great friends and they always go shopping together in the mornings. Bert calls to Max as he makes his way to the kitchen. He sees Max with a tin of black boot polish and a cloth...
12:18 Tue 22nd Oct 20137 answers, last by frozengal 11:08 Thu 24th Oct 2013
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marval

How Hungry Are You?

Would you enjoy eating here, or would you be put off? I would probably give it a go, just for a laugh. http://news.sky.com/story/1156807/toilet-restaurant-would-loo-believe-it...
17:56 Mon 21st Oct 20137 answers, last by pixie373 18:22 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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wendilla

Spacestation Sighting Over The Uk This Evening

1st sighting 6 35 pm for 4 mins WSW departing E 2ND Sighting 8 11 pm for 2 mins W departing SSW No chance here been rain all day....
17:55 Mon 21st Oct 20133 answers, last by Baldric 17:58 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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gness

Who Really Cares?

I was told some weeks ago that I had to move Mum to a nursing home within three weeks. I refused to accept the nursing home suggested by Social Services and worked my socks off to get her a place in...
17:09 Mon 21st Oct 201333 answers, last by gness 16:06 Tue 22nd Oct 2013
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frugalfred

Marriage

I haven't spoken to my wife for three weeks. I didn't want to interrupt her. My wife will buy anything that's marked down - she's just bought two dresses and an escalator. My wife has just had plastic...
11:06 Mon 21st Oct 20134 answers, last by excelsior-1 17:08 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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joeluke

Gamesmaster

I challenged a bloke to a game of darts down the pub last night. He beat me 3-0, hitting 6 180's and a 170 checkout on the way. We then played pool and he broke and cleared 3 times in a row without me...
14:17 Mon 21st Oct 20132 answers, last by frugalfred 17:07 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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Woodsz

Job Interview:

Job Interview: Human Resources Manager: "What is your greatest weakness?" Old Man : "Honesty." Human Resources Manager: "I don't think honesty is a weakness." Old Man : "I don't really give a f***...
14:20 Mon 21st Oct 20134 answers, last by frozengal 12:00 Wed 23rd Oct 2013
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frugalfred

Marriage II

My wife phoned me. "There's water in the carburettor!" "Where's the car?" I asked. She replied, "In the lake." If you don't like women drivers, get off the pavement. I miss my wife's cooking - as...
14:22 Mon 21st Oct 20135 answers, last by DTCwordfan 19:12 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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queenofmean

Caption Competition October 20

Here you go folks thinking caps on - sorry its a long un' Will pick a winner between 10-11pm tomorrow...
23:04 Sat 19th Oct 201334 answers, last by queenofmean 13:45 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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marval

Get That Duck

Two guys went duck hunting. One drank a bottle and a half of whisky while the other kept watch. After two hours, a solitary duck flew up. The sober man took aim but missed. "Quick," he said to his...
18:22 Sun 20th Oct 201316 answers, last by marval 16:52 Mon 21st Oct 2013
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Tilly2

Is There Anyone Not Doing Crosswords.........

or puzzles? My head is aching.
17:31 Sun 20th Oct 201344 answers, last by Tilly2 19:04 Sun 20th Oct 2013
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maggiebee

Cakes For Sale

Guy walks into a cake shop cause he sees a sign saying 'all cakes £1'. So he picks on up and takes it to the counter where the assistant places it in a bag and says "that'll be £1.50" The guy says...
23:18 Sat 19th Oct 20136 answers, last by cupid04 01:32 Sun 20th Oct 2013
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queenofmean

I'm Back

not that I've been away but just to let you know I'll pick up my weekend slot for the Caption Comp this evening. Hope you are having a good weekend :) Queenie xx...
18:01 Sat 19th Oct 20135 answers, last by queenofmean 21:52 Sat 19th Oct 2013
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marval

In Bed

Two old women were sitting on a bench talking. One asked the other. "How's your husband holding up in bed these days?" The second old woman replied, "He makes me feel like an exercise bike." "How's...
21:07 Sat 19th Oct 201315 answers, last by tonyav 22:18 Sat 19th Oct 2013
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slates

Colossal

clue lunar objects 5 letters i have mo?ns
19:21 Sat 19th Oct 20135 answers, last by vakayu 19:26 Sat 19th Oct 2013

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