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marval

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marval

Kittens

A pretty little girl named Suzy was standing on the pavement in front of her home. Next to her was a basket containing a number of tiny creatures; in her hand was a sign announcing “FREE KITTENS”...
16:42 Wed 22nd May 20134 answers, last by LochNessMonster 11:50 Thu 23rd May 2013
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marval

To Help Excel Sleep

What's the difference between a postman and a postwoman? A few letters. Famous Last Words Anne Boleyn: "Henry! I am NOT giving you head!" I once went on an 18-30 holiday, which was fun, but 12yrs is...
22:30 Tue 21st May 20139 answers, last by excelsior-1 23:10 Tue 21st May 2013
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marval

What Is That Sound?

A woman’s cooking had always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as she prepared dinner a bit too quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both of...
21:09 Mon 20th May 20132 answers, last by excelsior-1 15:49 Tue 21st May 2013
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marval

How Am I?

John was talking to his fiancée, Rebecca. He said, "Be honest, now, baby. How am I as a lover?" To which she replied, "Honey, I would definitely say that you're warm." "Really?" he said excitedly....
17:19 Mon 20th May 20132 answers, last by frozengal 07:25 Tue 21st May 2013
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marval

Letter

A young man, living away from home, writes to his parents. Dear folks, I feel miserable because I have to keep writing for money. I feel ashamed and unhappy to have to ask for another hundred, but...
16:17 Mon 20th May 20132 answers, last by excelsior-1 16:54 Mon 20th May 2013
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marval

24Hr

Needing some clothes cleaned in a hurry, a man searched the small Georgia town in which he was visiting until he found a sign which read: "Cleaning and Pressing, 24-Hour Service." After explaining his...
23:00 Sun 19th May 20132 answers, last by frozengal 08:23 Mon 20th May 2013
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marval

What Is Your Title?

Some friends were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says "I’m a YUPPIE, you know... Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist" The second guy says...
12:38 Sun 19th May 20132 answers, last by excelsior-1 15:25 Sun 19th May 2013
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marval

Naughty Johnny

Little Johnny walks into school one day to find a substitute in place of his regular teacher. She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. When you say my name class remember it has an "r" after the first...
23:22 Sat 18th May 20137 answers, last by Stargazer 23:53 Sat 18th May 2013
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marval

For Those With An Old Mouse

This memo is from an unnamed computer company. It went to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite serious. The engineers rolled on the floor...
22:57 Fri 17th May 20135 answers, last by Hopkirk 09:12 Sun 25th Mar 2018
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marval

Still Want A Laugh?

I don't attack people. I'm all stalk and no action. I bet Dracula does all his shopping online, just so he can keep clicking on "your account." I rubbed a magic lamp and wished for the genie not to...
20:47 Thu 16th May 20136 answers, last by excelsior-1 00:44 Fri 17th May 2013
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marval

Have A Laugh Pt.2

I'm often accused of eavesdropping. I just wish they'd have the guts to say it to my face I was telling a funny gag in the garden today, but the punch line was greeted with silence. Later on, my...
15:25 Wed 15th May 201310 answers, last by Jemisa 12:46 Fri 07th Jun 2013
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marval

Have A Laugh

I followed this white bird with really long legs home the other night. Police are doing me for storking. As a Kid I hated losing, so I played with myself. If you ever get attacked by a tiger just...
17:34 Tue 14th May 20135 answers, last by marval 13:43 Wed 15th May 2013
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marval

Is Art Funny?

As a painter, I'm proud to say some of my work can be seen in the National Gallery. I did the skirting boards. I found an old unframed oil painting in my loft yesterday of a beautiful naked lady so I...
10:22 Tue 14th May 20135 answers, last by Svejk 11:40 Tue 14th May 2013
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marval

Daft Thoughts

My mate insists on being called 'N' by everyone. He'll do anything to be the centre of attention. Why do celebrities call their children such silly names. My parents called me Robert because they had...
20:09 Mon 13th May 20136 answers, last by askyourgran 23:23 Mon 13th May 2013
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marval

Time For A Laugh

Did you hear about the man who opened a yacht showroom? Sails went through the roof. My driving instructor told me, never brake if there's an animal in the road. You should have seen the look on the...
16:43 Sun 12th May 20136 answers, last by Spoonboy 16:53 Mon 13th May 2013
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marval

Bribe

Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. "So," he said, "I have been presented, by both of you, with a bribe." Both lawyers squirmed uncomfortably. "You, attorney Leon,...
19:21 Sat 11th May 20133 answers, last by starone 16:36 Mon 13th May 2013
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marval

Ask And You Might Get It

An American woman goes to England to attend a 2-week, company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip. The wife answers: "Thank you honey, what would...
15:13 Fri 10th May 20134 answers, last by marval 17:05 Fri 10th May 2013
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marval

Motorway

Today, while driving on the motorway, I saw a guy shaving in his car and speeding about 65 miles an hour. I was so angry that I almost dropped my lipstick in my coffee....
11:46 Fri 10th May 20138 answers, last by frugalfred 17:01 Fri 10th May 2013
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marval

The Little Green Snake

A couple had a lot of potted plants.. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze. It turned out that a little green garden grass...
15:40 Thu 09th May 20138 answers, last by aelmpvw 18:28 Thu 09th May 2013
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marval

Tv

A woman was selling a TV to a middle aged man and his wife. The woman said, “So it’s between the 32 and the 36 inch TV, right?” The husband replied “Yes, but I don’t understand the...
18:01 Wed 08th May 20134 answers, last by frozengal 04:50 Thu 09th May 2013

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