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marval

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marval

A Man’S Guide To Fine Dining

A man invited a woman over to his home for a seven-course meal. "That’s lovely," she said. "What are we going to have?" He said, "A hot dog and a six-pack of beer."...
21:59 Wed 01st Oct 20148 answers, last by Jordyboy9 06:45 Sat 04th Oct 2014
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marval

Prepare For Takeoff

A man was sitting on a plane when a woman came to sit next to him. Ever the charmer, he asked. "Does the airline charge you extra for sitting next to good-looking men?" "Yes," she said, "but I...
21:45 Wed 01st Oct 20143 answers, last by askyourgran 21:52 Wed 01st Oct 2014
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marval

If You Had The Money

I have been spending a little time looking at property I can't afford. I came across this little hovel, it is so posh it even has a television in all the bathrooms. My question is if you had the money...
16:58 Wed 01st Oct 201449 answers, last by marval 21:27 Wed 01st Oct 2014
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marval

Adult

A lady rebels at a man, who is immodestly staring at her in a bus. Mister, you are staring at me as if you were undressing me in your imagination. Excuse me, lady, in my imagination I have already...
14:20 Wed 01st Oct 20141 answer, last by maggiebee 14:22 Wed 01st Oct 2014
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marval

Food

Little Elizabeth and her mother were having lunch together, and the mother, who always tried to impress facts upon her young daughter, said: "These little sardines, Elizabeth, are sometimes eaten by...
21:36 Tue 30th Sep 2014
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marval

Where?

The good Yorkshire wife apologised to her unexpected guest for serving the fruit cake without cheese. The little boy of the family slipped quietly away from the table for a moment, and returned with a...
19:56 Tue 30th Sep 2014
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marval

Aston Villa V Manchester United

An Aston Villa fan walks into a Birmingham pub and spots a guy wearing a Manchester United shirt. "Drinks for everyone here, barman," shouts the Aston Villa fan. "Except for 
Mr. Manchester United."...
22:28 Mon 29th Sep 20141 answer, last by DTCwordfan 22:32 Mon 29th Sep 2014
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marval

Husband

A rich couple hired a new chauffeur. The woman asked him to take her out shopping and was very shaken by the experience. Back home, she pleaded with her husband. "Please dear, you must sack this new...
17:50 Sun 28th Sep 2014
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marval

It's Those Children

At Sunday school they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was...
16:18 Sun 28th Sep 20141 answer, last by Obiter 16:23 Sun 28th Sep 2014
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marval

I Sold

I sold my vacuum cleaner the other day All it was doing was collecting dust!...
13:56 Sun 28th Sep 20149 answers, last by marval 14:58 Mon 29th Sep 2014
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marval

I Need

A female five string banjoist was heard shouting at her boyfriend in a crowded shopping mall: "Don't forget, sweetheart, I need a new G string."...
14:56 Fri 26th Sep 20141 answer, last by cupid04 12:11 Sat 27th Sep 2014
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marval

What?

What do you call a group of topless female accordian players? Ladies in Pain...
14:43 Fri 26th Sep 20141 answer, last by Old_Geezer 14:48 Fri 26th Sep 2014
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marval

How Old?

The census taker knocked on old Miss Barker’s door. She answered all his questions except one. She refused to tell him her age. "But everyone tells their age to the census taker," he said. "Did Miss...
22:50 Thu 25th Sep 20141 answer, last by Old_Geezer 16:08 Fri 26th Sep 2014
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marval

I Was

At the urging of his doctor, an elderly man moved to the countryside. After settling in, he met a neighbour who was also an older man. "Say, is this really a healthy place?" "It certainly is," the man...
21:40 Thu 25th Sep 20145 answers, last by DTCwordfan 16:15 Fri 26th Sep 2014
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marval

I Feel

I feel like my body has got totally out of shape. So I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted,...
21:27 Thu 25th Sep 20148 answers, last by pixie373 21:45 Thu 25th Sep 2014
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marval

Cheek

A young woman was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when she noticed an old lady following her around, but she ignored her and continued on. Finally she went to the checkout line,...
18:25 Thu 25th Sep 20141 answer, last by coffeeboy 21:10 Thu 25th Sep 2014
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marval

Cat

One of my neighbours owns several cats. On a recent visit, she introduced them to me. "That’s Astrophe, that’s Erpillar, that’s Aract, that’s Alogue." "Where on earth did you get such unusual...
16:11 Wed 24th Sep 201415 answers, last by marval 16:32 Wed 24th Sep 2014
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marval

Police

The murderer was holed up in his house, and the police team was trying to get him out. A policeman got on the loud hailer and said, "Come on out, or I'm going to come in there and drag you out!" The...
22:38 Mon 22nd Sep 20141 answer, last by cupid04 13:51 Tue 23rd Sep 2014
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marval

Paddy

Paddy was spotted driving along the road at a steady speed, when he suddenly indicated right and pulled off onto the hard shoulder. He quickly jumped out of the car and opened the boot. From a large...
20:03 Mon 22nd Sep 20146 answers, last by Slapshot 12:07 Tue 23rd Sep 2014
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marval

What Sex

A woman who was nine months pregnant was browsing at a car boot sale. When she stopped at a stall, the owner asked her if she knew whether she was having a boy or a girl. 
The woman told her she...
18:02 Sat 20th Sep 2014

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